They are Not Different

"Down's Syndrome" kids are really just like us"

by Rotem Giovanni, Amit Comprehensive High School, Safed

Sometimes we look at them and they look different, but when you get closer, you discover that they are regular kids: they also have feelings and they can be hurt like anyone else. So why do we think of them as deficient?

I want to introduce you to a very special woman called Haya Ben Baruch. She comes from the States, but now she lives in Safed. She has five kids, three of whom have Down's Syndrome, and two of those are adopted. When I came to the house for the interview, Avihai greeted me in a very friendly way, shook my hand and asked me in Hebrew what my name was. Despite the fact that he doesn't speak very clearly, his mother understands him. While I was interviewing his mother, he kept coming up and giving me toys or offering me something to eat.

Did you know that you were going to have a Down's syndrome child?

No, I didn't, but it didn't matter because I wouldn't have had an abortion. At first even the doctor didn't know that he had Down's syndrome, but I thought he looked as though he had, so they checked and found out he did, and he had a problem with his heart and he had to have open heart surgery when he was 3 months old.

How did you feel when you first saw him?

I loved him from the moment that he was born. Because he had a heart problem he was so important for us. A friend of mine said, "If God gives a family a child with Down's syndrome, it means that that is what is good for them." She meant that we could bring him up well - and it makes us stronger. Thank God, he is alive, and that is the most important thing.

How did your family and friends react?

My mother has accepted him. At first she didn't, but she gradually began to. She was very surprised when I took Keren too and I explained to her that it was for Avihai's good. We got her on his first birthday!

Are the children well integrated, socially?

They go to a regular kindergarten three days a week and three days a week they go to a special one. Avihai is six now, and next year he's going to school. He can go to regular school, but he has to have a private teacher.

Four years later you adopted another child with Down's syndrome. Why?

Because I heard there was a Down's sysdrom child in the hospital whose mother had abandoned her. At first my husband was very doubtful, but I was sure that we would cope. I think that we can give her a good home.

Isn't it hard?

When you're busy, you're busy. Maybe with them you're busier, but all the love and happiness they give is worth it. The worst thing is how people look at them.

How do your other children react to Avihai, Keren and Shalhevet?

Ari loves babies and Daniel doesn't mind. They accept like any other children. They were three and four years old when Avihai was born and Keren came a year later. When Daniel heard about Shalhevet and that her parents had abandoned her, he just couldn't understand them and he wanted to help.

What is Down's syndrome?

When a person has one too many chromosomes, they can get Down's syndrome. This means that their development is much slower than that of other children. Because of social prejudices, they aren't given proper attention and so they often don't learn to read, some don't even learn how to feed themselves and they find it harder to find jobs.

This passage is part of an article which appeared in TEN - The Youth Newspaper of the Amit & Amal Schools in Safed, Spring 1998.

For more on Down's Syndrome kids, see A Warm Home for Jonathan.

© 1998, Amal Pedagogical Technological Center