Respect and Tolerance

RESPECT & TOLERANCE - LESSON PLANS

LESSON 3: "WOMAN GUILTY OF SLAPPING DAUGHTER, 14" (This lesson does not require the use of computers)

The following activity is a Jigsaw Reading activity. The idea was taken from a story I found in the following Internet Site - "The CyberMom Dot Com - Back Porch"

a. Silent reading:

Students read the following story.

"NOVI, Mich. - A woman who disciplined her 14-year-old daughter with a slap to the face, giving her a black eye, has been found guilty of misdemeanor assault and battery".

"[The mother], 32, said her conviction Thursday sends the wrong message to parents. ‘You’re going to have a bunch of out-of-control teenagers doing whatever they want’, she said. ‘Jurors have no idea what they’ve done’".

"The conviction carries a penalty of up to three months in jail and a $500 fine, although the judge said he will not jail the mother."

".... The events leading to the charge stemmed from years of trouble that Amber [the daughter] admitted she caused, including stealing cigarettes, drinking liquor, and disobeying her mother."

".... [The daughter] testified that she was grounded on the day of the argument but left home anyway. She returned hours later and shouted profanities at her mother, stepfather, and a house guest, then went to her room and blared the stereo".

"It was then that her mother confronted her and hit her shoulder and face during the argument".

JIGSAW READING

STAGE 1

Group A - Read the following reactions to the mother’s conviction.

Open a new file in WORD and summarize the reactions.

The Courts Overstepped

Bern, from Sydney, Australia

Parenting and the Law together walk a fine line in protecting our children..

Does this young lady need protection from her mother? I don’t think she

does. Does this young lady need protection from herself? I think so. Her

mother takes responsibilities for her own actions. This teenager needs to do the same. What message does the court put through to this young lady?

That it is okay for her to disobey her mother, verbally abuse and steal....

Because she will always have it’s ‘protection’ when her mother looks for ways to get through to her. I do feel that the mother was walking on a fine line that snapped the day she gave her daughter a black eye. In hindsight of the build up to the situation, I would not imagine myself behaving much differently. Parenting is not something that has a right or wrong... So I feel for that mother, and I pray I will never have the woes that have led her to be convicted for loving her baby.

Natalie, from Grand Rapids, MI

The conviction of this mother is ABSURD!!!! This daughter was totally out of control and obviously had no respect for authority and especially her mother!!! I feel the mom should probably not have slapped her daughter so hard but confining her and grounding her did not help!!! They both should have been in counseling and the daughter especially in a TOUGH LOVE program!! The mom should have been attending parenting classes!!!

I feel sorry for this family, I do not think the mother should be fined or jailed but rather the mother and daughter need serious counseling and intervention from social workers and therapists!!!!

Connie, from Palmeron, PA

This is getting way out of hand.... Arresting a mother for slapping her child? Is it any wonder, that the children of today have no respect for anything, any more...... Too much talking and trying to reason with kids....

They need to know, just how far they can go... They need boundaries.... A slap, in my opinion, is NOT child abuse......

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Group B - Read the following reactions to the mother’s conviction.

Open a new file in WORD and summarize the different reactions.

The Decision to Convict the Mother was Sound

TJ, from Atlanta, GA
The conviction was just. Why do so many think it is OK to hit, slap, kick, and otherwise violate SOME people just because they are our offspring? Ridiculous! ALL people need to be treated with understanding, respect, and tolerance, ESPECIALLY our own kids. When a child is in trouble, teens in particular, it’s usually due to a lack of communication and mutual respect in the family, NOT because someone "spared the rod". Statistics show NO evidence that spanking, slapping or otherwise perpetrating violence on our children acts as a deterrent of any kind. In fact, statistics DO show that children who come from homes where violence is common are much more likely to end up in trouble. And if you think that spanking and slapping your child isn’t "violence" you are kidding yourself!!!
Alyce, from Texas
This mother was completely out of line. I am a foster mother and every single child that comes into our home has had parents that use "corporal punishment". This mother has probably been "slapping her daughter" all of her life and that is what got her in this spot to begin with. Teenagers need mutual respect. For this mother and this daughter it is too late to build the foundation that should have been built over the last 14 years. They will need professional intervention to get through this very difficult time for both of them.
Jessica, from New Jersey
There is a line between discipline and physical abuse. Black eyes, bruises and cuts, etc. cross that line. There is absolutely no reason to assault a child to that extreme, regardless of what transgression you are punishing them for. A parent with that type of discipline problem on their hands needs to consult a family counselor, psychiatric facility, drug rehab center, parenting support group, etc. for help. Beating the kid up is not a solution, and it won’t make the child behave. It makes them hurt and angry, and poor behaviour and rebellion in a teenager. Any parent of one should know better.

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Group C - Read the following reactions to the mother’s conviction.

Open a new file in WORD and summarize the different reactions.

It’s a Tough Call

Dee, from Conway, AR

This is a touchy issue, I think. The family obviously needs help. I don’t think the conviction of the mother is the answer. Both parent and child are in the wrong here. The mother, for a little too much pack in her slap and the daughter, for her behaviour that led to the confrontation. The judge should have recognized this. For only the mother to be punished here, is sending a message to the daughter that she can behave in any manner that she sees fit and is protected from recourse, by the law. The mother will now be hindered in controlling her "out of control" teen.

Lois, from Brookfield, WI

I guess I feel kind of conflicted about a situation like this. I certainly do not believe that violence should be used to solve problems and have never had to resort to hitting my son that I can recall. Then again, we are not people who use profanity in our every day language with one another, either. Children who conduct themselves in such fashion are, it seems to me, following the role models which have been set for them - a variation on the old "the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree" routine. In other words, if children see their parents treating each other and themselves with respect, they will respond in kind and, even when they become angry, will not resort to the kind of behaviour which was going on in this home.

Becky R., from Mt. Cook Village, New Zealand

I agree it was completely inappropriate for the mother to hit her daughter. I would suggest anger management, parenting courses, and family counseling. This situation isn’t someone’s fault. It is an accumulation of events that made the mother explode. The daughter may also, be in need of tough love from both her mother and stepfather. It’s important in modern days that everyone in a family has a say and needs to be heard.

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STAGE 2

Members of Groups A, B, C get together, forming new groups. Each member shares the information he got from his reading with the other .

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STAGE 3

Group work: Students remain in their groups.

"You are the members of a committee assigned by court to decide whether to let the 14-year-old girl from the story we read, divorce her mother. Consider the girl’s age, the mother’s conviction, the girl’s previous discipline problems.

The members of the committee:

A social worker

A lawyer

A high school teacher

A member of the local student council

Task:

Type your decision in a new WORD file.

Save your file under the name "Divorcing parent from child".

E-mail your decision to the court address provided by your teacher.

Present your decision to the class.

This lesson plan was prepared by Ahuva Dotan, English teacher, Amal Lady Davis High School, Tel Aviv